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(By comparison, annual memberships at Hacienda, in Bushwick, are priced at $120.) traffic to its website and accompanying app has increased by 300 percent.) For single men, annual memberships at SNCTM start at $10,000 women, once accepted by the club, can attend for free. (Additionally, a representative from Killing Kittens - a members-only sex party that’s headquartered in the United Kingdom but holds events in New York - reported that since the start of the pandemic, its New York membership has grown by 25 percent, and the U.S. Robert, the company’s managing director, told me over the phone that the club saw applications from twice as many first-timers as before the pandemic. SNCTM - a private members’ club that hosts sex parties in New York, as well as Los Angeles, Miami, Moscow, and Kyiv - was one party that saw a particularly robust increase in applications from people who were new to sex parties. There was at least one place where that feeling of uninhibited joy, of celebrating togetherness after a long period of isolation, raged on. Several also observed an unprecedented influx of newbies - a trend that dovetails with the Kinsey study, in which nearly half of respondents were interested in investigating their sexuality in a more intentional way. Party guests and employees told me that people seemed hungrier to attend - and, once they were there, to explore - than ever. Two of the four parties required proof of vaccination the other two allowed a negative COVID test. Over the course of the summer and early fall, I attended four different New York–based sex parties: one in June, one in August, one in September, and one in October. But there was at least one place, it seemed, where that feeling of uninhibited joy, of celebrating togetherness after a long period of isolation, raged on: at sex parties. As the Delta variant spread, New Yorkers of all stripes had to reassess their risk of catching the disease, even if they were fully vaccinated. After a frenzied spring, people burned out on socializing and small talk.
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(Monogamy had a moment, too 52 percent of single respondents said that a committed relationship is what they wanted next.)Īnd then, hot vax summer seemed like it was over before it had really begun. An April study done by the Kinsey Institute (in partnership with Cosmopolitan and Esquire) seemed to confirm this: Of the 2,000 respondents, 46 percent percent said they were engaging in more sexual experimentation, while 19 percent said they were more inclined to pursue an open relationship in the future. But, in the spring, as more and more New Yorkers became fully vaccinated, hot vax summer seemed imminent. “Sign of the times,” I heard myself say.įor the first year-plus of the pandemic, indoor parties of nearly 200 people seemed like a distant memory for many New Yorkers, not to mention indoor sex parties of that size - although smaller gatherings, as well as Zoom sex parties, happened in perpetuity. “One time, I confused the hand sanitizer with lube,” Bolanos said, laughing and shaking his head, “and accidentally put hand sanitizer in my partner’s pussy.”
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At one point, he explained that there were safe-sex stations throughout the venue, all of which included items like condoms, dental dams, lube, wipes, and hand sanitizer - the last of which Hacienda didn’t offer before the pandemic.
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His chest was bare and completely smooth, but beyond that, he wore fox ears, paw mittens, and a rainbow tail that wagged as he wobbled across the mattresses to facilitate a series of consent-focused exercises. Leading the orientation was Rene Bolanos, the company’s event producer. Eventually, there would be about 175 partygoers, but this smaller group arrived early - showing identification and proof of COVID-19 vaccination at the door, first - for orientation and a consent workshop, which Hacienda requires for guests who are new to sex parties, new to Hacienda parties, or both. The party that evening, Fucked-Up Fairytale, was slated to start in earnest in a half hour. The basement - and the rest of the three-floor brick townhome above it - was owned by Hacienda, which functions both as a live-in community and an organizer of sex parties and educational workshops. Lining the periphery of the room were beds - mattresses on the floor with dark-gray sheets - on which, in a matter of hours, many of these people would be having sex.
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Many wore costumes: There was a young woman with fairy wings, a devil-angel duo, a trio draped in ivy. On a Saturday night in August, in a cavernous basement in Bushwick, Brooklyn, about 60 people milled around under a ceiling covered in cherry-red twinkly lights.